CPTSD Therapy
Online Therapy UK & Europe and worldwide
CPTSD Therapy Online
People who live with Complex PTSD (CPTSD) often feel 'crazy' without really understanding why. This can profoundly impact how you feel about yourself. You may feel faulty, worthless or worry that you will be found out as not good enough.
Working online can be as effective as in person work if there is a good therapist client fit. This also allows you to see someone who specialises in CPTSD who might be hard to find face to face.
I often work with English speaking clients based in Europe or other parts of the world or with clients who haven’t found the right therapist in their own country.
Who I work with
I work with adults who suspect they have, or have been diagnosed with, Complex PTSD (CPTSD) following childhood trauma.
Many of my clients have achieved a lot in life: careers, degrees, relationships, but still feel stuck, empty or unsure why they can't move forward. Successful people often doubt they could have CPTSD but still find that the description of it matches how they experience life.
Experiences that can contribute to CPTSD include:
Emotional, physical or sexual abuse
Childhood emotional neglect (CEN)
Growing up with a narcissistic, controlling or abusive parent
Feeling unsafe, unloved or alone
Growing up with emotionally immature parents
Repeated or prolonged childhood trauma
CPTSD symptoms
Shame
Feeling worthless, useless, faulty or not good enough, or being ashamed of yourself.
This can affect confidence at work or make it hard to put yourself forward for things or believe in yourself. You might struggle in relationships because you don't understand why your partner likes you, or worry that your partner might leave you or find someone else.
Emotional regulation
This means difficulty regulating emotions or not knowing what you feel.
This can look like big reactions to things other people consider small, difficulty calming down or getting stuck in shame spirals, feeling sad or having bouts of anxiety. People often describe 'cycles' of being OK and then crashing, which can last many months.
It might also mean that you 'cut off' or dissociate, spend long periods of time alone or ruminating, or find it difficult to be consistent with things that are important to you when these reactions take over.
Emotional flashbacks
Sometimes called feeling flashbacks, emotional flashbacks can be hard to recognise as flashbacks since they don't have a visual component.
People can misunderstand these as 'overreactions', and they can seem like they come out of nowhere. Clients describe these as 'one minute I was fine and the next minute I wasn't', without knowing why or being able to explain to others what happened.
Relationship issues
Being in a close relationship with someone can be very hard.
Although most people want to be in a relationship of some kind, this can feel overwhelming for people who were also hurt by people they loved and trusted. This can lead to push-pull dynamics where people try to get close and then feel suffocated.
How is CPTSD different from PTSD?
PTSD and CPTSD have a lot in common, but CPTSD also involves difficulties with emotional regulation, how you feel about yourself and relationships.
CPTSD is often associated with repeated or prolonged trauma, particularly when someone felt trapped or unable to escape. For many people, this began in childhood, although it doesn't have to.
In the DSM-5-TR (a diagnostic manual used mainly in the US), CPTSD isn't recognised as a separate diagnosis from PTSD. In the ICD-11 (which is used in most other countries), it is recognised as a separate diagnosis.
Do I need a diagnosis?
Most of my clients don't have a diagnosis. Many people who have been self-sufficient have often avoided seeking one. This doesn't mean they haven't been impacted by their histories.
A lot of my clients come to me after reading Pete Walker's Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving, an excellent and easy-to-read book which talks about CPTSD and how to heal from it. My work is compatible with his approach.
What if you've already tried therapy?
Many clients come to me after trying different approaches: meditation, self-help or even multiple therapists.
You probably already understand a lot about trauma and wonder why you're still stuck.
I find this normally happens when people need help with emotions, either learning to feel them or struggling to experience them without being overwhelmed.
In CPTSD, emotions can feel dangerous, but this can be changed.
The role of shame in CPTSD therapy
Most people underestimate the role of shame in their lives. Their shame often pervades everything.
It keeps people criticising themselves and what they do, and prevents them from asking for help because they imagine that other people will think as badly of them as they do of themselves.
It means that everywhere they go, they see things through a lens of being problematic or faulty.
It often stops people from setting boundaries with difficult family members, friends or partners because they believe they deserve how they are treated, or that it is somehow their fault. They often tell nobody about this because they fear it is something that will drive people away.
Where shame comes from
Generally, people are supposed to grow up believing that they're ok, unless they've done something specifically wrong. But many of my clients feel bad about themselves for no obvious reason. They take that feeling as evidence that there must be something wrong with them.
What they often don't realise is that the belief that they're fundamentally ok may never have been properly installed in the first place.
I normally start by looking at what their childhood was like. Often it's a long line of people who felt bad about themselves somehow communicating to their children that they weren't ok either. Sometimes this happens unintentionally. In many ways, it's children who look like adults trying to raise children, without ever having worked through their own difficulties.
Of course, these ideas can also develop later, perhaps at school or through experiences with other children. Unkind teachers or being bullied can factor in.
I look for where their ideas about themselves started to go wrong.
My extensive knowledge of shame means that we look at how it affects different areas of their lives and begin to loosen the ideas they have about themselves.
When shame is getting in the way, it can be very difficult to see what's what. As it starts to disperse, it becomes possible to see things differently, understand what's happening in relationships and find other ways to take care of themselves.
Without this, people can remain stuck in an echo chamber of believing they are bad.
How CPTSD therapy works
I help you:
Identify patterns in relationships, self-esteem and emotional responses so we can try new ways of being or behaving.
Deconstruct emotional flashbacks and triggers and manage them so that they end quicker, are easier to recover from and become less frequent.
Deal with difficult emotions without shutting down. This often means asking other people for help and support.
Unpick and change unwanted behaviours without blaming yourself for getting it wrong or being a failure.
Practise healthy new behaviours both in therapy and with other people.
About Sarah
I'm Sarah Lee, a UKCP-registered psychotherapist specialising in childhood trauma, Complex PTSD (CPTSD) and childhood emotional neglect (CEN).
I work with adults who are struggling with the impact of their childhood experiences, particularly shame, emotional flashbacks and difficulties in relationships.
You can read more about my background and approach on my About page.
Session details
Format: Online via Zoom
Duration: 50 minutes
Cost: £130 per session
Frequency: Weekly recommended (minimum twice per month)
I work with English-speaking adults in the UK and Europe, including expats living abroad.
Are we a good fit?
If you:
Want guidance on change, not just empathy or listening
Are willing to take responsibility for thinking about your issues between sessions
Want to see what's keeping you stuck and how to move forward
Prefer someone who understands trauma from experience, not just textbooks
Related resources
What is CPTSD and do I have it?
What is an emotional flashback?
You don't need to know exactly what's wrong: you just need to be willing to take the first step.
Book a free 15-minute call to see if we're a good fit to work together.
